Tennis Racket Model

An interesting concept proposed by a professor named Derrick Hinson. The Proposed Theory compares a relationship with a tennis racket, and the steps necessary to obtain success in one's relationship. We start off on this model at the point of DISCLOSURE, this is the point in a relationship where both individuals disclose information about themselves, (age, likes and dislikes, professions, etc...) almost similar to a job interview disclosure covers the topics that are asked by the other person, and nothing further. A sense of like and intrigue must be embodied at this stage for the relationship process to continue.

Next step is TRUST , this is rather tricky because ones past experiences can completely hinder this step. Even if ones past calls for them to keep their guard up at all times all is not lost, but the partner with the trust issues must realize and understand that each individual is their own seperate being, and must be judged according to a clean slate, and the individual on the other end must also take into account that the partner with the trust issues will require more work and effort in order for their partner to truly let loose of old thoughts, and feelings, and embrace them fully with compassion.

Next is INCREASING PERSONAL DISCLOSURE...this occurs when two individuals start feeling more comfortable with each other, and start freely dishing out information, (where a person lives, amount of sexual partners one has had, basically thinking out loud to a certain extent) this stage not only touches verbal issues, but also non verbal issues as well. Actions, some say speak louder than words (using the bathroom with the door open) These are all signs of increasing disclosure in hopes of leading to the next step...

INCREASING TRUST how and when do you know you are at this level, simple... you just do, no thoughts in the back of your mind, no unexpected visits in hopes of catching your partner in the act, you just do!

INTAMACY occurs when, and only when steps 1-4 have been reached, intamacy allows for both individuals to relax and let their conscience be free. Your mind will sometimes drift into fantasy worlds, like marriage, or starting a family with your partner.

COMMITMENT is the final stage in the process, this is where you give 100% of yourself to the other person, other man/woman may look more attractive, and claim to be able to offer more benefits than your partner, but when you are committed all of that takes the back seat for your partner. It is not about you and me anymore, its about "us" the other man/woman can not fullfill these expectations, they can simply please a certain mood for the short time being.

The Vertical Strings on the tennis racket are the NORM OF RECIPROSITY defined as the social expectation that people will respond to each other in kind; returning benefits for benefits, The Horizontal Strings are our EXPECTATIONS, and the tennis ball are violations. Everytime the ball connects with the strings a violation occurs, depending on how strong the strings are will determine whether a persons relationship will falter, or last in times of desperation.

The circular form of the tennis racket means that this is an ongoing ordeal, you can not simply get to level 3 and feel that you will be in a successful relationship, because one mistake can send you back to the begginning, or worst case scenario not in a relationship at all. Therefore these steps must be follwed exactly, and practiced and implemented on a consistant basis.

REMEMBER, THE KEY TO A HEALTHY RELATIONSHIP IS COMMUNICATION.... EQUAL COMMUNICATION.
romance and relationships

Husband of the Year Awards

The honorable mention goes to :
The United Kingdom



....followed closely by The United States of America



and then ............... Poland



but 3rd Place must go to ........ Greece



it was very very close but the runner up prize was awarded to....




.............. Serbia



but the winner of the husband/partner of the year ...... is .......

Ireland




Ya gotta love the Irish.



The Irish are true romantics. Look, he's even holding her hand.



Woman has Man in it;



Mrs. has Mr. in it;



Female has Male in it;



She has He in it;



Madam has Adam in it;



Okay, Okay, it all makes sense now...



I never looked at it this way before:



Ever notice how all of women's problems start with MEN?



MEN tal illness



MEN strual cramps



MEN tal breakdown



MEN opause



GUY necologist



AND .



When we have REAL trouble, it's a



HIS terectomy .



Send this to all the women you know to brighten their day.



Send this to all the men just to annoy them .......






Remember You Don't Stop Laughing Because You Grow Old,
You Grow Old Because You Stop Laughing

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